Cathy Barker - Lessons for Life With Gramma Kate
How I Found Joy By Finding My Life's Purpose

When was the last time you felt joy? A minute ago, a week ago, or maybe it has been so long you can’t remember the last time you felt joy. The feeling that lights up your world and fills you with energy and hope.

What is the Meaning of Joy?

Joy is a feeling of deep happiness and contentment. It’s more than just laughing at a funny joke or smiling when something nice happens. Joy is a warm, uplifting emotion from within, no matter what’s happening around you. It’s a spark in your soul that keeps glowing, even when life gets tough.


Joy is a deep emotion that often arises naturally and unexpectedly. For example, you might feel joy seeing a loved one after a long time, hearing your favourite song, or achieving something meaningful. This kind of joy is something you feel in the moment, often without any effort.



Joy can also be something you choose to cultivate. It becomes an action when you intentionally focus on finding joy—through gratitude, kindness, or pursuing activities that make you happy. Sharing joy with others, like spreading laughter, helping someone in need, or creating a positive environment, is another way to make joy an active part of your life.

So, joy is both a state of being (feeling) and a way of living (action). When we treat it as both, we can experience it more fully and share it meaningfully.

Joy vs. Gratitude

Joy and gratitude often go hand in hand, but they’re not the same. Gratitude is feeling thankful for something specific, like a kind word from a friend or a beautiful sunset. Joy, on the other hand, is more significant and broader. Joy is the sense of being happy just to be alive, even if nothing important has happened. Gratitude can lead to joy, but joy is about your whole outlook on life.

Why is Joy Important?

Feeling joy isn’t just a nice feeling —it’s healthy, too! Joy can:

  • Boosts Energy: Joyful people often feel more active and excited about life.
  • Improves Relationships: When you share joy, it brings people closer together.
  • Helps You Stay Strong: Joy can help you handle tough times better.

How I Found Joy By Finding My Life’s Purpose

Joy and purpose are deeply connected. Living purposefully means doing meaningful things that align with your values. Living with purpose creates a foundation for lasting joy because you’re not just chasing fleeting moments of happiness—you’re building a life that feels fulfilling.


Finding purpose often means discovering what truly matters to you, whether helping others, creating something beautiful, or simply making the world a little brighter. When you act purposefully, joy follows naturally, like a spark igniting a flame.


Purpose isn’t about perfection; it’s about progress. When you live with intention, joy becomes a constant companion, reminding you that life is not just about what you achieve but how you grow along the way.


Here is an example from my personal life. I signed up for coaching with a business coach a couple of years ago. It was the last session, and we discussed my next steps. As I started talking to share my deepest desire, uncontrollable tears welled in my eyes as I tried to get out the words: “I want to write my children’s books.”  For ten years, this was a yearning deep within my soul. I wanted to write books to help children with low self-esteem issues because my emotionally abusive mother destroyed mine. 


It was a pivotal moment for me and my coach. I had this yearning but didn’t act on it because I believed I didn’t have the financial resources. How do you write a children’s book and find an illustrator? But I truly believed my children’s books were my purpose in life. 


I didn’t let fear get in my way and began the process.  Finding an illustrator was the most challenging and costly aspect of publishing my books. But I persevered, knowing that all these challenges were leading me to my goal of being a published author.

I am excited to share that I now have four children’s books in my series, Lessons for Life With Gramma Kate. They sell on Amazon, or you can have your local bookstore order them through Ingramsparks. Each book is a life lesson for children aged 6 to 12. When discussing my children's books, people tell me my face changes and brightens with excitement. That is joy filling my body. But what if you haven’t found your purpose yet?

7 Steps to Find Your Life’s Purpose

Finding your purpose in life can feel overwhelming, especially if you’re unsure where to start. Purpose isn’t always obvious—it’s often uncovered through reflection, experimentation, and growth. If you haven’t discovered what drives you yet, don’t worry. Here are seven steps to help guide you on the journey to finding your purpose:


1. Reflect on What Brings You Joy

Start by asking yourself what makes you feel happy and fulfilled. Think about moments when you’ve felt truly alive or proud. What activities, causes, or experiences light up your soul? Joy is often a clue to your purpose because it reveals what resonates deeply with you.



2. Explore Your Values

Your purpose is often tied to your core values—principles that matter most to you. Whether it’s kindness, creativity, or justice, identifying these values helps you understand what gives your life meaning. Write down your top five values and consider how you can live them out in your daily life.


3. Pay Attention to Your Challenges

Sometimes, your struggles can lead you to your purpose. Reflect on what you’ve overcome and how you can use those experiences to help others. Turning pain into purpose is a powerful way to create meaning in your life. That’s precisely what I did with my children’s books.



4. Experiment and Try New Things

Purpose isn’t always found by sitting and thinking—it’s discovered through action. Try new activities, volunteer for causes that interest you, or explore hobbies you’ve been curious about. The more you step out of your comfort zone, the more opportunities you’ll find to uncover what excites you. Doing, helps you to learn what you do like, as much as what you don’t like. 


5. Ask Yourself How You Want to Impact Others

Purpose often involves serving or inspiring others. Think about the legacy you want to leave behind. How do you want people to feel because of your actions? Your purpose might lie in making someone’s life better, even in small ways. You can ask yourself, what problems in the world or your community do I feel passionate about solving?


6. Listen to Feedback

Sometimes, others see your strengths and passions more clearly than you do. Pay attention to what people often thank you for or encourage you to pursue. These insights can reveal clues about your purpose.


7. Be Patient and Open

Finding your purpose is a journey, not a race. It’s okay if it takes time or evolves as you grow. Stay open to new possibilities, and trust that purpose often unfolds naturally when you follow what feels meaningful to you. At the age of sixty-five, I finally found my purpose. 


Your purpose doesn’t have to be one grand mission. It can be as simple as bringing joy to your family, mentoring someone, or creating something that inspires others. No matter how big or small, your purpose is valid if it brings fulfillment to your life.

What to Do When Joy Feels Far Away

Sometimes, it’s hard to feel joy, and that’s okay. Joy isn’t gone forever—it just takes time to come back. Try:



  • Practicing Gratitude: Write down three things you’re thankful for each day.
  • Talking to Someone You Trust: Sharing your feelings can lighten your load.
  • Finding Joy in Memories: Look at old photos, videos, or keepsakes that remind you of happy moments.
  • Joy is Contagious: One of the best things about joy is its spread! When you smile, laugh, or show kindness, others around you feel it, too. By sharing your joy, you make the world a brighter place.

Conclusion

Our children learn by watching us. When we live with purpose, embrace joy, and face challenges with resilience, we show them what it means to lead a meaningful life. By setting an example of kindness, determination, and authenticity, we give them the tools to find their purpose and joy. After all, the best way to teach our kids is to live the lessons we want them to learn.


Joy is a gift we can all choose to give ourselves. It’s more than a fleeting moment of happiness—it’s a way of living that fills our hearts and strengthens our spirits. Whether through gratitude, connection or simply enjoying the little things, joy is always waiting to be found.



What brings you joy? Share your thoughts in the comments. 

  Remember, change begins with ourselves.


Put your knowledge into action and reach your full potential !


Wishing you heartfelt warmth 

and support on your parenting journey!


Cathy


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